It's Not Always Easy, Just Worth It

In my rich experience, however you come to the Sacred within your self, it will be by transforming all you believe is not. Like your suffering, self doubt, addictions, unprocessed anger, fear, guilt and shame. The real goody grab bag of your deepest and darkest secrets you try to hide from the world, from yourself and if you really could, from God are what you have to place on the table. Eventually, you gotta get naked before the Beloved and let it all hang out. In this respect, you can run but you can't hide.

Ironically, paradoxically and so apropos, these in fact are the precious gem stones that once faced and embraced, will allow you to Love your self all the more. They are your free pass go cards. Not only won't they likely POOF! go away and disappear, they will hound you until you open your Hearts to them. Your wounded children do not go quietly into the night.

They kick and scream and eventually, if ignored long enough, finally get your attention by getting you sick as hell. If not putting you into an early grave way too soon. Either way, you have face the pain, the grief, your sadness within. And yet, you gotta be crazy to go toe to toe with all the accumulated shit stored in your Shadowland warehouse. You must be a bit nuts to be willing to face the music - again why so few of us humans are actually free, clear, happy, healthy and whole.

It isn't always easy but it's always worth it. Like everyone else I know, I was raised in an atypically normal dysfunctional family. From the outside, all appeared above normal, from within, it was a doozy melange of addiction, anger and incestual undercurrents. And I've come to believe I caught a really good draw in the parent department. They were both good, decent, hardworking, educated, honest and integrous people. They were also extremely conflicted and unfulfilled as individuals and as a couple.

As you can imagine, these emotional and energetic currents of discord and discontent, like water, flowed down generation. As is so in most all familial dynamics, the pain goes from parent to child. This primal parental information becomes the belief system conditioning that makes up our sense of who we are. The fact that it's all arbitrary and inherited packaging is lost on most of us - until we do our self healing homework that is.

 If we're ever courageous enough to actually want to change, if we ever learn to peak out from under the wall to wall shrouded overlays of our preconditioning, we may just have a chance to create happiness for ourselves and in turn, touch our world in this benevolent way. And from my experience ... it's a long shot.

When I first went to healing school at The School of Energy Master, within the very first week, one of my instructors pulled me aside and dropped a flash bomb in my lap saying, I was living my life from my wounded inner child. Huh? Say what! It was like being shown a whole new color not previously recognized in my normal visual spectrum. And yet, it's clarion pure clarity hit me right between the eyes and nearly took my breath away.

I just knew I'd been given a priceless nugget of immense wisdom that I also knew I had no idea what to do with. From that point on, this insight became a non stop healing virus that kept eating away at my pain body - a nibble here, a chunk there, a whole buffet load of funky shit was served up for my Ascension digestion.

And here lives the down, dirty and gritty real truth to the Awakening process, our Heaven lies beneath the buried shit of our disowned pain. To clean it, clear it, transform and heal it you have to Love it! The real masters of Earth School have learned the power of Forgiveness, of Gratitude of dare I say, self Love. A master always chooses Love - especially with themselves.

... to be continued ...