Sunday, March 3, 2013

It Cuts Both Ways

The sword of transformation can slice clean, even and smooth, removing the unwanted nonsense from your life. Just so. It can also cut deep and rough with a sorry jagged edge into and through the areas not ready to be released and let go. Just so … However, as the Fickle Finger of Fate arrives suddenly at your doorstep, often unexpected and knocking all too insistently, expect sweeping changes to come to your life because change you will. Count on it, especially here and now in 2013.
 
One of the misnomers or misconceptions previously afoot is that The New Earth would be waiting of us, all resplendent in Its radiant glory sometime soon after the heralded December 21st Mayan deadline due date. Oops, not quite … Was everyone wrong? – what did we think would occur – and now that the bloom, glint and glimmer is off that rose, what will happen now? I’ve often wondered what the dooms day naysayers feel the day after the end of their world didn’t and how they then picked up the pieces to their faith and trust, once again. 

As I’ve come to put more and more of my marbles on the table of this very Present Moment, fully believing that Spirit’s got my back, I still have to come up with the $$$ to pay my bills and cover my rent. Regardless of the 5th dimension coming more into view, the 3rd D sure keeps getting in the way of enjoying the scenery.

Making it here in NYC is a 24/7 deal, one that requires the very best of me. I know if nothing else, I’ve made it this far in my life, making it through significant and noteworthy challenges … and yet, this new terrain demands I dig even deeper to mine the fuel to keep propelling me along. This isn’t the early ‘80s when I came here fresher and a far cry less wise. None of us can rest on past achievements and old street cred. It seems we all have to reestablish our self value, worth and Spiritual credentials anew. If only for ourselves, we must keep doing whatever it takes to keep our boats afloat. And in this town, paddling along comes to feel like a full time job.

Case in point: the living situation I’ve been in since last October is quickly coming to an appropriate end. Without going into detail (to honor all participants involved), the time is ripe to move on. Yes I know, when one door close, another opens. However, when the first door is swinging on its hinges, it’s not always so clear what awaits on the other side. As always don’t you know, it’s a grand leap of Faith. This is one sure way Spirit knows it has our full attention. When your number gets called, as it always eventually does, it tends to always catch you by surprise. In this instance, the comfy zone bubble is momentarily popped, leaving me thumped though at this point, not too fazed.

One of the benefits of having consistently made the arduous treks up the steep karmic mountainsides, I know I’ve been battle tested plenty enough … and one of the downsides is, I know the effort it takes to make it up to a yet another new vantage point in my life. Not having just fallen off the turnip truck, I have a fairly good idea when this entails, as in … I was told in a reading 6 yrs ago that I would be a Sadhu of sorts for the following 7 yrs, not having a steady home of my own, always living in other’s, just passing through. This extended time has certainly taught me to keep going inside to get my bearings, pay attention to how I feel in what’s going on around me, act accordingly and simply show up as best I can to meet and honor the present moment at hand. Simple, really

I now choose to be the Beloved to the moment – to serve, support, celebrate and inspire life around me as best I possibly can. As it turns out, in order to pull myself out of a couple of to-death-do-I-go really Dark Night of The Soul passages, lasting nearly 2 yrs each, ten years apart, having among other things,  thankfully come up with a personal mission statement or code of honor I could live by. As a man to be a man, I had to find my internal compass pointing in a direction all of me, my Soul first, wanted to go. Although there are areas of my life I am calling in big time abundance, most of all, I call in being happy with whatever is.

Gratitude is the attitude. All the Spiritual training of all times means bupkis, if you don’t Love yourself deeply and express your Heartfelt gratitude to others, at least in my eyes. 

I know of so many people feeling lost and confused these days, not to mention friends of friends and family of friends dying away now. As predicted, this year will see an accelerated exit plan taken by many Souls who’ve just had enough here. They either want to take a time out from Earth School or go to another district to try other curriculum.

The Karma Lotto System spins apparently at random, with some getting way more than their share of tough breaks and hard knocks. I for one, in the larger scheme of things, have had it pretty darn easy. No childhood illnesses long lingering in my life, no terminal diseases picked up from a public toilet seat or crazed drivers taking me out while I ride crosstown in traffic. I Am Blessed, through and through let me say.

Years ago, I had a wonderful girlfriend, Deborah Mills, a most accomplished healer and facilitator, who once remarked towards the end of our time together about how far I’d come since knowing her. Her observation was followed by a tongue in cheek remark – ‘good thing, because you really needed to!’ And that was back in the mid-90’s. Since then I’ve had my ass handed to me enough various ways over this time, by life and the Universe at large. I’m sure I’ve paid my full dues to earn the right to be Here, Now. Like the eternal web and flow of the tidal motions of the Awakening process, we periodically get good behavior, quiet time off reprieves. 

These respites always come to our immense relief, however, like erratic clockwork, are always followed by the thump thump thump of gotta get back to moving through something someone someplace or some situation else that’s forcing you to keep evolving. These, often showing up as unwanted and unannounced visitors you know you have to attend to but for the life of you, just wished would go away.

Hey, I too have longed for the Holiday cabana by the beach with extended lounge service life plan. Just keep bringing the cold drinks with the funny umbrellas on top, the big frosty ones that make me forget I’m on Earth primarily to express and manifest. Being whacked out at high tide does not much motivation make. Fittingly enough, I have had these times. I‘ve lived on beautiful Ibiza, an island off the Mediterranean coast of Spain for 4 glorious years, just knowing I’d found my eternal resting place. But alas, got lazy and a bit complacent, did I. 

Most tropical environs have a tendency of doing this. Ever hang out in old Key West for extended periods of time and get much done? Not very likely, unless it’s specializing in the Duval St bar crawl and Sunday afternoon tea dances, the perfect way to round out a long extended and in those daze, party expensive weekend. (But really, such fun ...)

Eventually, it’s time to get back in the race, hopefully not being chased along in a hurry, rather running smoothly towards your goal. To Awaken to the Divine within you and the Sacred as you. The Awakened Sacred Masculine views their life out side of time, a part of a bigger current and context not so often spoken of at large. It has always been this way – this Earth School place is an equal opportunity zone for a great many different human species (and others, I’m sure), all to co-exist somewhat well together though historically, not so well for very  long.

There isn’t anyone I know who isn’t facing a Crossroads of Life Moment these days. Not all major heavy duty whammos but enough are. Maybe this is the 2013 Effect in action. We all have to go past who and where we’ve been to be what we are becoming. No, there are no readable roadmaps or useable blueprints showing us the way. For us men, this is perhaps even more the case than our longer awakening sisters. We have yet to anchor in the Brotherhood into our collective masculine consciousness, creating the support system awareness where we intuitively choose to attend appropriately to each other, as need arises.

As an aside and a rule, the contacts I’ve made with men here tend to fall off short, where they more often than not, do not return or follow up on calls. I still can’t figure it out. Do I smell funny? Do I come on too strong, pushing buttons - does leading with my Heart, wanting to connect on deeper levels than casual conversations, trigger resistance? Apparently so. Are most men, even ‘conscious’ ones comfortably capable of going there? Having had many awakening women friends over the years, I quickly became envious of your close knit bonds forming at first meeting which always transcended, age, culture, religion or whatever identity markers obvious at hand. Yo! Not us guys. 

Perhaps like the eternal pissing to stake out our territory mentality, as a newer arrivee here, I’ve often wondered if these fellows felt threatened by yet another man coming in to take their claim of the resource pie. In this instance, the available clients who request our various healing services. Who knows what drives us in these ways if not fear. Simply, I‘ve been looking for human connection, a new reference point in my own sense of myself of what Brotherhood can look like now.

Who knows no one does. I’ve become resigned to this, almost giving up that this will change. Although, I’ve never ever wanted to actually be a woman, dress up or the like, I sure do admire the way you ladies can move past your boundary limitations to connect in with each other from a sincere Heartspace place. It really is impressive.

As the blade cuts the line between what does and does not support our lives and growth now, it’s sometimes tricky business knowing what actually is serving our highest and greatest good and what’s just a carryover from a comforting addiction still in the mix. Again, who knows … but hey baby, we’re all Here right Now, finding out.

… to be continued …

In the midst of whatever is unfolding upon the planet now, we all need (when we do) an ally on the trail to help us place our feet, just so ... the work I do, Heart Tantra, will assist you in removing the doubts, fears and unwanted resistance in your emotional and mental bodies, allowing you move with more confidant, peace and ease.

For more information on my work, please view my web site at heartantra.com or contact me directly at heartantra@yahoo.com

PS If you felt moved, inspired, touched, supported, annoyed, or anything else after reading this post, please let me know. I really do appreciate your comments and feedback. It’s easy and only takes a minute.  Click on 'comments' or 'no comments' below. Also, if you feel inspired to share this with another, please do so! .

Also, our recent Full Moon Awakening Sacred Union Circle was a Lovely success.
Our next Sacred Union Circle will be for this upcoming New Moon, March 11th.
Watch for Facebook notices and please plan on joining us!
Thank You.




1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hi! I'm a woman but my sacred masculine is alive and strong. He wants to give you a high-five. :)