Grace In Your Face ~

What better place to have the Beloved show up in your life? Face to face. In this respect, I aspire to always see the undeniable presence of Grace forever staring me in the eyes, wherever I look. If only, finding out a bit ago, the things I see outside – and the way I see them - are always an immediate reflection what’s happening within. In every shape and shimmer, the refractions ‘out there‘ mirror my personal awareness, spot-on. How I‘ve wished this wasn’t so! For no other reason than I was sick of my reflections, I was spurred to look under the natty rug of my ego and sneak a peek downstairs in my sizable, Shadow’s basement closet. Yikes.

I somehow knew this was my lifetime to take the plunge, having reached a flip-switch, turnaround point in my Soul’s evolution. As spirals move out in one direction, simultaneously they go elsewise the other way. It’s all a matter of relative perspective, isn’t it? A Soul’s journey is anything but linear though here in Earth School, the order of progression is the natural order of things. Fall follows summer after spring grew out of winter. It just works this way. It’s the cause and effect factor. Karma and all that.

To overly simplify: at some moment in a Soul’s journey, there is a shift that occurs. Most usually after an especially challenging, difficult and painful experience (or many), that irrevocably catches your attention – the Grace of suffering – that makes you choose to stop doing what hurts so much. In my experience this is rarely voluntary. An old Chinese saying goes: only when you become sick of your sickness will you cease being sick. Talk about tough self-love but alas, I’ve found this often to be true.

There’s a term I first heard when Carlos Castaneda came out, speaking from the Toltec way of knowledge, called ‘a Shaman’s blow.’ It’s a punch or physical impact to your body delivered by a master that blasts the shit out of your self-perception - your personal view of your self and your world. Its intention is to help shatter your ego. Only then can it potentially reconfigure in a clearer or more transparent way. It’s a ‘warrior’s path’ of awakening, not for the faint of Heart or weak of constitution. New Age fluff and bluff it most definitely isn’t.

By no means is this a required course of study for everyone. No siree. It however, does apply to the more hardheaded of us, the ones who’ve built up considerable baggage that calls for more drastic measures. It’s a very bottom line, Grace-in-your-face approach to cracking your ego’s nut. Early in my life I was drawn to follow a modified version of this gut-check, self-healing path. I must have known, if I was ever going to perceive clearly through the open lens of my personality, seeing the eyes of The Beloved looking back at me, I’d have to keep taking the next step forward. No matter what - and so I do every day.

As a twist on the old saying: before enlightenment, chop wood, carry water, after enlightenment, grab your ax and pail and get busy. However you empower your awakening in life, being in a physical body necessitates you act more consciously as a result. If not, what’s the point? To quote an old friend; to know better means to do better. Not a lot of fluff there.

Personally speaking, it’s far easier having fresh memories of two brutal, 2 years of Dark Nights, 10yrs apart, where I couldn’t hardly leave the room or get up from bed. I was seriously a mess. In fact, being a mess would have been an upgrade. My life was shit because my sense of self was. In short, I completely lost faith in my self and my world. My beliefs would have it no other way.      

Having an especially shamanic birth chart (astro-speaking), the light that helped guide my way has been my limitations burning up in me and my life. Making it this far through the fires of transformation, believe me, has taught me all I ever need know about awakening my Sacred. It’s like this for the alchemically inclined. However, under all certain terms, unless I’d anchored in my daily Spiritual practice – meditation specifically – I never would have made it successfully through those dark times. Never.

Speaking of which, meditation boils down to simply this: getting totally and relentlessly present. 100% or as best you possibly can. Only then will you discover the biggest secret of all. It is so utterly simple and near impossible to achieve. To open the arms of Grace evermore, all you need do is never believe your thoughts are true. Or real, for that matter. This especially goes for your emotions as well. This is the nonnegotiable biggie. When this clicks, Grace comes to dwell in your garden like a beautiful orchid, longing to take hold and continuously bloom in your life. Perfectly so, this an unavoidable outcome to your awakening

When you’re no longer at the behest and command of your thoughts and feelings, you will become free. This cellular knowingness is what separates an aspirant from a realized master. To wit: The Buddha apparently said: the difference between me and a beggar is he only thinks he’s a beggar and I know I Am Buddha. Catchy to the Heart of the matter.

Perhaps like many of us these days, I sometimes feel trapped in an extended version of ‘living in Limboland,’ particularly dwelling in this mighty Mecca of Materialism, NYC. It does try one’s patience, I must say. As my personality questions the workings of Grace (still!), being mindful that I’d certainly have things very differently arranged - really I would – this isn’t the bottom line now. I remind myself this really isn’t about me or my personal needs anymore. Been there, done that to no great outcome.

I’ve learned the magic only comes from aligning my own needs with the higher design of my Soul. This is my Grace Place, my face to face time with the Beloved as me.

Thank You & Love To Us All ~

  

PS I am seeking assistance in publishing my work here and invite any and all benefactors, editors, agents and or publishers to help bring this to fruition - any ideas? Please feel free to contact me at heartantra@yahoo.com ~ Thank You So Much ~

PPS I invite you to share these posts with anyone you feel would benefit and if you feel inspired, to write your feedback insights through the ‘Comment’ key on this blog. Also, please check out my work, Heart Tantra - The Attunement Session - on my web site heartantra.com. I offer in-person sessions here in the NYC area and absentee or long-distance work if you don't. Always Blessings On Your Way, Keith